The Art of Starting Over

When I was a kid, I always loved the movie Forrest Gump, but not for the reasons you may think. Back then, I didn’t care so much about the cast, or the time-hopping premise, or the slew of historical figures peppered throughout the film. What I loved was the way Forrest was able to live so many different lives throughout the film. He wasn’t just a soldier; he was a ping pong champion, a shrimp boat captain, a runner. What I saw in that film was a person who wasn’t tethered to being just one version of themselves for their entire life. They were free to be — well, anything.

To me, a life well lived has always meant a life that spilled out over its edges. A life lived outside of the box. A life that strayed so far off the beaten path that no chartered maps could provide reference. 

What I wanted most was a messy, unconventional life where I could cover the paint strokes on the canvas when I don’t like what I’ve painted and begin again. With that comes an intimate relationship with risk and chaos, with danger and dismay because starting over is an art form with a very few particular set of rules.

Start with the end in mind

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step, but the art of starting over begins with the end in mind. You’ve gotta know where you’re going. You need to be so clear and certain of your destination that you can see it when you close your eyes. You need to be obsessed with it. You need to imagine what it’s like, how it sounds, how it feels to be there. You need to be able to imagine how the sun feels on your skin when you get to where you’re going.

I find that after I’ve gone through the hurricane of life, having a strong sense of where I’m trying to go is the strongest beacon to turn things right side up again. It’s what allows me to dust myself off and keep moving forward. 

If you don’t have this destination firmly planted in your mind, then it may be that you’re just not ready to set forth on this journey. But don't be disheartened, this doesn’t have to mean you can’t ever set sail on this path; you just may need to wait until the finish line becomes clearer.

Believe that where you’re going is greater than where you’ve been

In order to go on this journey, you can’t second-guess where you’re coming from. You need to be certain that the port you’re traveling to is a sweeter port than the one you’re departing from.

This is the only way to confirm that you’ll have the resolve to fight through the hard days that are certain to come. Starting over means renouncing the way you used to live and finding a new nexus point to build from. You can’t do that while looking over your shoulder at what used to be. Believing wholeheartedly in where you are going implores you to keep your eye on your goal and stop second-guessing what might have been.

Failing to relinquish the past in this way can lead to sloppy mistakes amid the chaos that is this new change in your life. And don’t be fooled, there will be chaos. However, if you are certain that what lies ahead is worth more than what you’ve left behind, you’ll be prepared for smooth sailing, even when the waters get choppy.

Prepare a financial safety net, for the good times and the bad

A little money never hurt anybody, and a lot of money saved beforehand can make beginning again an easier transition to make.

Bad Finances are the quickest way to turn your new life into a new nightmare. Not preparing for your change in lifestyle with a fully funded emergency fund and financial safety net beforehand means you are likely to crash and burn before the going really gets good. Before you’ve really had a chance to spread your wings and fly as high and as far as you can.

Nothing could be worse than missing out on your chance because of something as predictable as money. Planning diligently alleviates that stress before it begins, allowing you to focus on your new life. A fully funded emergency fund of up to a year’s worth of living expenses is ideal when considering a change. This amount of money will allow you to remove money from the equation completely when making decisions in your new life and focus on the decisions that really matter.

Starting over can be messy. It can be chaotic, tumultuous, and harrowing, but it can also make for the most amazing times in your life. Having the courage to begin again means having the courage to make an uninspired life into a life worth living.

The art of starting over can lead to many great things, but it starts with just a few simple rules.